Like seriously why is this happening? Discuss with the husband/boyfriend: He is your love. Her mother and sister were both telling me it was my responsibility to take care of the dog as I was the only one there with it. I think if your boyfriend isnt willing to work with your feelings and change some of his dogs behaviors (and his own), then maybe you wont ever truly have the loving relationship you deserve. Ive come to believe many large breed dogs have this characteristic. Sometimes we do everything right. It is downright disgusting. Completely agree, do people really not realize that their human is there for life? She has this dog that is very poorly trained, basically not trained at all. Dogs only want to please their master and its up to you to spend the money or Time to learn how. Hello I am in a similar situation and its been very hard. Contrary to what you may saythe answer is yes, you would. So, I really recommend doing so. No amount of communication with my husband has resolved this issue and i refuse to compromise over my health. Im sad to say that things have only gotten worse. I am at my wits end with this! He does not bathe the dog for months and expect me to watch TV with a dog that stinks. Nessa, the dog nipping at my kid would have been the last straw. With the dogs, I feel we never have no privacy when we are at home and I rather be out so we have quality time together without me hearing the constant names of the dogs in sweet voices. I may sound angry right now because i am. As time goes on I thought I may get used to it as I force myself to accept things. So when the last one child moved out, we were stuck with them, and I became the sole responsible one for all three. First and foremost, our pets are like our kids. (As He has already said his dog will come first always) He already thinks I despise his dog which I dont he jsut doesnt understand I dont know how to deal with the constant need and attention I love this man and never want to lose him over a dog but how should I go about dealing with this? Just changed some psychology in my way of thinking and its not that important. Period! Then suddenly, he brings he dog to the new house!! But that theory originated with Sigmund Freud who also came up with the Oedipus Complex and Penis Envy. How did you end up going with Beau? Shes always on the furniture and in the bed (she knows she isnt suppose to because she jumps off when I walk in the room). Your task is to re-direct that energy. And ofcourse I would want them a good new home. Even if your dog has biological problems, like my BFs anxiety-ridden dog, training really helps. When she arrived she was on the couch. We came into the marriage my spouse knowing that I do not like animals. I would not wish my past experience on anyone, it was very painful. It violates their commitment to their dog. I think instead of writing bad things about dogs you have to think about your loved ones not the dogs. I mean seriously, who doesnt like puppies? They do NOT understand human speech. I adore my lady. The guy I am with hates dogs with a bloody passion and I have THREE. We got into a horrible fight recently over it, he agreed to see if giving his dog anxiety medication would help. BUT now I should now have a conversation about whether a dog is allowed to sleep in the bed or not before I should consider taking a relationship with this person? She became whiny , would cry every time we gave baby attention or even if hubby would change babys diapershe started barking louder whenever we come home from the store she stil allowed to sleep in our bedroom and it annoys me. I wish you all the luck and hope your situation improves. But your dog is your responsibility as well as a loved member of your family. But I just do not have a bond with his dog. He was content sleeping on the ground on an old pillow ( i did hear him moan from time to time while she cradled him so i suspect he didnt actually like it but accepted it) I have happily accepted buying him an official doggy bed :). They are very, very good dogs. You are ripping away something that they are bonded to, a hobby that they like, a fun animal that they enjoy. I said I would not get married if she slept in the bed. Dogs do not fail us, we fail the. All rights reserved. My boyfriend and I have been together for 4 years and I absolutely 100% do not like his dog. Its ok, to talk about THOSE little ugly things. She also brought two clawed kittens into the house. Hi Logan, I am living the same situation with my bf. also to those who hate pets what not. At that time I had an 8 year old yorkie (who is now 10) and my husband had never owned a dog before in his life. Sowe bought a house together & moved in. If you arent satisfied with your dogs behavior, and obviously, The husband/boyfriend isnt either, its a genius idea to try a doggy daycare intermittently for several days. I have been thru this many many times and want to tell you dont give in. I cant continue to live in the house with this dog and his behavior. You, and those like you, anthropomorphize human feelings onto dogs. Especially when they keep it up because they arent satisfied! Our brains are capable of complex thought and emotion! when I try to teach him something I get pushed away. My dog, for being aggressive. That cant happenhe wants me to belive this lie. The smell, the barking, the poop, the wee, the high medical cost etc. Am I crazy for feeling this way? She has a female dog and I have a male dog. I knew he loved his dog going in, but it wasnt until we started dating that I saw just how much his dog sheds and how insane his love is for his pet. And no offense but if you had your fur baby BEFORE the fiance. if you ignore her she gives a bark for attention and climbs on. I have no idea why those words are being shouted out when not one have I said its me or the dog, which by the way I have every right to if we arent a fit anymore. I can not have anything nice because this dog will destroy it. She has 5 dogs and I cant even begin to describe that situation. He doesnt care if he hurts his self in the process. When we take trips they stay at a kennel that costs 3x as much as normal kennels, where they sleep on cushions. Its so depressing to me this is not what I want in my life, or in my relationship. A pets companionship is not altruistic, unless it goes out and gets a job and helps contribute to the functioning of the home and is able to articulate advice to you on living life in this world as a human. I have never felt that way about any animal before, but she is just terrible. Dog nuts just dont get it. He had a cloth sofa which was in the basement. The thing is, i told her hes ok at the foot of the bed, i dont mind him on the bed if hes there and i had been telling her for 3 months to start training him but she jokingly would refuse to do so. I dont want to over think this again. Tell him, "We're just going to look," and see if he falls in love. Just like it would be a mistake to get involved with someone with children who hates hates hates children. And one of the dogs, also keeps drinking from the toilet and chews up garbage from the trash can in the bathroom, even underwear! Im sure this isnt the answer you want to hear but its the answer you already know: its time to move on. I am doing all the training, but I work full time and hes home during the day. If i made any of you guys live with something you hated you will 100% get it. He blames it on her being a puppy which shes 1 so she is. So, puzzle toys are an excellent way to ease the boredom in dogs, especially in puppies. I love him so much. So basically, my bf and I live on opposite sides of the house. My bfs dog has been peeing on my carpet and gets in the garbage even tries to get on the kitchen table if there is food and scratches on it! When she says I murdered it shes not being facetious; she literally believes, and has said repeatedly, that putting that dog down was dog murder despite the vet thought it was long past time. They would get along great! Sometimes, your husband/boyfriend may attempt to get rid of the dog because of less compatibility with other pets in the household, which means the dogs aggressiveness to other canines, cats, or any other pet. The hamster is in my room. I have a partner that was open to my dog in the begging after about 6 months and moving in with her things changed right away, She stopped feeding my dog, walking my dog and tells me how mush she hates him. Do you INVITE your partner to bed? My boyfriend has 2 dogs. Ultimately, his dogs comfort has proven to be worth more than mine! That dog needs to go, and if your S/O refuses to get it in check, then perhaps you need to go as well. Ive been with my boyfriend for two years we currently live in a house with 6 animals 3 cats, a dog, and two rats. Husband now is only concerned with dogs appearance rather than his wife. It literally drives me to resentment. But I cant say/see it that way. When he tried to go to bed, the dog would be there first and would growl at him when he tried to get in. Those dogs life expectancy is 12 years so in just gate things off etc. It truly is frustrating.. Im very attached to him. I am in a very stressful relationship where I love both my dog and partner. I dont think a dog should snarl or growl at anyone, much less one of his masters. This dog is very affectionate with everybody, including kids, other dogs, cats, he doesnt even chase squirrels. My HUSBAND wanted a dog more than I. I like dogs, not love them. People are way too into saying put the pet above the human relationship and thats a bunch of B.S. I just dont know what to do. An infant is unable to comprehend parental love until their memory begins to prove around the age of 3. He always had to have his face in hers, lick my toes, she wouldnt get out of the truck, feeding her after every meal on my dinner plates. as long as you aren't trying to force him to get rid of the dog then you're NTA, otherwise you are. Its the point where I find him being childish for being mad at the dog all the time, sometimes just because the dog made eye contact. But that does not happen. Therefore, you should go through its diet plan and create an appropriate diet plan with the assistance of a veterinarian. Im not against the dog, dogs in general are just not for me anymore. He doesnt feed him, water him, or even acknowledge him except for when he has an accident which may be once a month. yeah? He compliments the dog and acts like its his actual girlfriend. We are going round in circles and Im stuck in a situation where I love my partner to bits but cant stand his dog and feel its not fair to get rid of her and keep the puggle which might end up in resentment from my partner. Place a few towels on the furniture armrests to wipe the drool. Font make it an issue of choosing the dog over my mate. Shes a one person dog. People who defend the animal to the bitter end kill me. Its the ultimate narcissism: other people will never reflect back perfectly, but dogs (pack animals with an instinct to) might, and computer games (programmed for exactly that purpose) also might. THIS IS ALL SOO WRONG. My SO and I have been together for 4.5 yrs and he moved in 3.5yrs ago with his cat. This sofa was destroyed with her saliva as shed wash on herself to the point the drool dried and harden. The wife admitted that she babied and held the dog all the time because she was feeling some kind of way now that her kids were teenagers and werent as dependent on her as much anymore. Its not like getting rid of a toy. I dont know why people like that breed. Now he gets mad at me go saying anything about his dog or if I complain about it. We wanted to provide links to some resources that may be relevant to you here. They were shaking so bad and drooling from immense fear. The dog has health issues and a husband/boyfriend. My partner is so wonderful she had already done research on how to make our future home livable for me when I expressed my concern. My SO doesnt want her outside and cant manage to find the time to train her. My guy would never put that thing in a crate. How do any of you that do this have a good sex life?! And can you respect him if he gives into your bullying? There is no chance in hell after half a decade of being with someone would i let them disrespect me that way. Im not a fan of bulldogs. Im at my wits in because I totally resent him which spills over when we have an argument about something else. It was confused, anxious, and in pain. If you guys are having troubles over PETS, the relationship is never going to last, anyway. this dog just stares at me to say you wont do shit when shes saying yes. Its causing me anxiety when ever I come home. But, I highly recommend you consult a dog behaviorist prior to meeting a relationship advisor. I dont think thats an unfair and unreasonable request considering all that I would be giving up to be with him. She is okay sleeping in her bed,but is preferring to sleep up next to me. My last dog and cat slept with me until I realized I was lifting my leg in the middle of the night and wasnt getting very sound sleep. Just because you dont feel a certain way doesnt mean that everyone that doesnt feel that same way needs therapy. She had a 10 year old golden when we met and I bonded with both the girl and dog. Im tired of it. This is a new relationship with the girl I am currently dating, so I dont want to throw in the towel just yet. Let your poor little puppy go to someone who will give him love not abuse. Except I had the Siberian Husky, who showers regularly and smell great. So I searched and searched for a tiny dog. Consult a veterinarian: Meet your veterinarian right away and seek advice and take necessary actions. Wow Jay youre problem definitely sounds like what I am currently dealing with! Are you looking for solutions on what to do for this? I feel like we live in a prison with these dogs, and Im a 4th class citizen under him and 2 dogs. Everytime he cries now if hes not in the bed which drives me nuts, I love dogs. Maybe because all he does is yell at him. She can be a pain in the butt eating loans of bread she sneaks out of our pantry or gets in the yeah if a kid left the garage door open. He is not used to being yelled at all the time for not doing anything wrong and it is tearing me apart. and respond to behavior modification with varying methods. He did just that, and more. Actually, here is why your husband/boyfriend wants to rehome the dog? I cannot sleep with my bf, or watch tv with him (both dogs get on the couch between us if there is any affection), cannot have a meal without incessant begging, cannot travel or have fun day-trips out of town because he wont leave the dogs. Where am I supposed to go to? Either way, that puppy probably should find a new home. Its not the dogs: its the people, and its not us, its them. I was so relieved when we moved 3 hours away to stay with other family that doesnt allow dogs. I actually feel with time, I will pity the man in the end. Or at least me, shes a heavy sleeper. Get it together. Dog stays off the furniture, gets her own doggie bed for the bedroom, and he sweeps everyday. Not if you would have been watching him, the amount of money it has cost us because of his lack of training involvment has made me physically ill. HOW do I communicate to someone who LOVES their pet so much that they litterally and honestly feel the pets do no wrong???? Sadly, our girlfriends do not know or are aware of how they are being played. I vacuum three times a day or more. Is he a narcissist since he has isolated you from friends and now your furry friends? It violates their conscience. Any helpful advice please? She did the bed thing ONCE in the beginning and I only got one hour sleep and was a wreck the next day and said never again. It does not help she has nipped me before and has a tendency to walk behind my legs up close which freaks me the hell out! My spouse allows her to do all of this and gets angry when I bring the problem up. B My Australian shepherd is just a puppy and has done some destructive chewing, which he was properly punished for, but he didnt start this habit until I met my boyfriend. We have a 7 month old baby and he is choosing his dog. He isnt even searching for a home for them so I guess Ill have to. Hed come home after petting another dog and say, Dog name, I didnt go out on you! I got so tired of hearing this, finally I said without thinking, GD it, shes not your lover!. Get away from these animals as fast as possible. This decreases the amount of time and emotional energy you have available to spend on your relationship with each other. We are renovating a 1958 house with every penny we can during my weekends she actually does very little in this project, but its not about all that its about her boundless defence of these dogs that cost a fortune. If this is the situation, you will have a hard time solving this issue. Often the garage can be an example. then eventually praised with her favorite things because her response was very good. ! For god sakes! Why are people sleeping with animals? If you change something it needs to be repeated again and again until they get it. Its all good in theory and they always say Well take care of them Well pick up the poop ya right, been there done that not doing it anymore. He thinks dogs belong outside. That being said, you are being selfish and cannot say live your life to keep him happy. They cry & come & stare at me. If youre the pet lover, ask your partner specifically what the issue is and what would fix it. A partner than doesnt take care of their dog, doesnt train it, give it exercise or give it what it needs ( not wants) is the problem not the dog. My dog died at 3 years old. I tried to do this, but it was too much. But you can break free of that abusive situation once you see the whole picture, the picture that we are all trying to help you to see. and our I didnt get any attention except when he asked whats for dinner. The dog is to have free reign of his home, she was there for him first. I dont know how I can get past my sense of betrayal. It creeped around corners, wouldnt go anywhere without surveying the situation. Am I wrong for wanting him to get rid of it? I want my fiance to be happy again but I also dont want to give up the dog either. So I consciously made an effort to not make high pitch sounds and to say hi to hubs first. This works greatespecially if this is a smaller dog. When you cant trust him anymore and continues to misbehave, its pretty difficult to handle the situation. And animals can turn on their human masters just as easily. (Him not liking your dog is a stupid reason if thats it, and I agree with your family if that is the case). Taking care of an animal is a good way to gauge how well you work as a team and to find out what makes your partner tick. He has had training and about every option there is for this issue and he just cant stop. I can not understand a human being, your husband, not having any sympathy or understanding for an animal in pain. I dont dislike pets but they have their own place-my bed is not that! And she was sleeping under the covers in the bed with him. OR, if you are out of this area, inquire about a telephone or e-Lesson Its really causing a strain on my pregnancy and my marriage. He got to keep his and i felt it unfair. The dog likes to jump on the couch, claw the carpet and the couch, bark at any little noise and I swear the bark shakes the entire house. I left him alone with my little dog and strangely he was hunched over and in a lot of pain. It simply would not be tolerated. 2. So, lets see what you can do about this. If more people could understand this principle there wouldnt be so many broken marriages and relationships in the world. A partner does not need or rely upon you with its life. Popular doesnt mean its right. (2012, January 11). Spending time got more minimal and the dogs kept coming first. After that year, my fiance decides without my consultation to adopt a rescue dog. Shes stubborn and lazy. And dog lovers cant do that. Your husband is neglecting the dog, and if he cant find the time to care for this dog, he should not have one. Nails hitting the hardwood floor?? Very Hyopallergenic. This makes me so sad. He cuddles with Fido on the couch every night, while Im on a separate chair. I am engaged and although I have known my fianc has never cared for inside dogs, he has always tolerated them even at their most annoying times. The fact that this dog is so unmannerly and disobedient bothers the shit out of me!!! Well, good luck on the whole situation. They were extremely thin. I have not ever hated dogs. Time to cry myself back to sleep. My SO tried to downgrade this saying oh, he wont really bite or i dont think its a big deal we got into a huge fight over that one. or live a miserable life? From here, I knew that my husband should be the one to choose her, because I love all Boxers. When I dont stay over for a day or two and return I can see the dog has been sleeping on my side of the bed. I will wait untill the dog dies and then he sells that house and we get our own place together and NO DOGS!!! Shed bark, hed jump while at the same time hed say snide things to me, would compete with me about things, or one up me. I hate that dog! When he got his pup thats where mostly all his focus went. Last night, I saw walked outside and saw the lights in my basement on, so I went down in the basement to find her dog running around. Beau IS NOT ALLOWED to move from his bed at night because it will wake him up. She did not approach the man even when he was waving a 45$ Steak. Just food for thought. I learned a lot from my last doggy relationship and its a blessing that it ended because I wouldnt like to live like that. But its a hard one!! As far as dogs go, this one is a sweetie. Do you ever just feel like ending your relationship because of this issue? I was beginning to look at my husband quite differently and cry. He said that was just the nature of the breed and we couldnt do anything about it even though I absolutely HATE a wild dog jumping all over me when I first come home :-( The truth is, he just couldnt stand to see/hear his dog whining during the training (like keeping him on a leash when people came over until he calmed down), and would give in, and when I tried to keep it up, would get mad at ME. About a year and a half after dating we found out we were pregnant. This should be obvious. Just because he states its all shes known her whole life doesnt mean that she isnt supposed to learn. I started to resent her when I was outside with her waiting ten minutes for her to finally decide to go when I had so much to do for my 12 hour work day. Its to the point I have to watch him with everything he does. Obedience training. For example, every time shed drink water, she would use someones legs as a napkin. 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